Friday, June 29, 2012

Bursting

  
In February, I discovered intuitive painting, and my life has been changing ever since.  I'm sweeping creativity into my life.  I want it to expand to the point of bursting. 

Since I started painting, I have also signed up for some formally instucted classes, and here is what I know:  Formal instruction is not for me.

It shuts down my creativity. 

It's the reason that I stopped creating in the first place. 

It makes me want to stop and hand my brush or my project over to the teacher, as theirs always looks so much better and I don't seem to be doing it right.  One class I took we traced someone elses' art and then copied what they had painted with the colors. 

I learn from these classes about what my creative direction is and where technique falls into my world.

I want freedom and light.  I want to get away from the rules, regulations and rigidity that consume my working life and painting intuitively is my guide.

No rules.  No "try it this way" or "maybe you should do that".  Just me, my open heart and the quiet voice that shows the way.  We're working things out together, this voice and I.  Working out frustration and the desire to quit when things don't look quite right or go how I want them to. 

Experiencing pure joy when things flow and time passes without my knowing. 

Not worrying about the outcome, the finished product or what comes out.  Sometimes I like it, sometimes I mess with it too much and "ruin" it with thinking, but it's in the experience itself that I am learning my lessons. 

Things that I can't see when I'm just grappling with words or thoughts.

Things unseen until they emerge from nothing onto the paper.

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